E-Noirmony
by SkyeRibbon
Summary: Marinette agrees to build an online dating profile at the behest of Alya, hoping it will make Adrien jealous. After asking Chat Noir for advice on romance, he is prompted to do the same. And nobody knows you're a cat online. (rated m for future chapters)
1. Chapter 1

E-Noirmony lol

In Which LadyBug is Conned into Online Dating

"Ha ha, no. Good try _ha ha but no."_ Marinette pronounced each syllable of the fake laugh with a venomous bite to strike her point home. She glared, half playfully annoyed, half genuinely annoyed at her friend, whose glasses slid down her dark nose as she pouted her lip.  
"Come ON girl, you've got to live a little. At least look at your options before you turn the whole thing down. Do that for me, please, won't you?" Alya's pout deepened into a smoldering puddle of puppy dog eyes and pity. Marinette sighed and leaned back into the swivel chair's creaky lack of back support, rubbing the bridge of her nose in defeat.

"Ok, look, Alya, you know darn well that...I'm...well I've got the whole thing-"  
"With Adrien sure, yeah the model you can barely STUTTER a sentence to." Alya squinted her eyes and shot the black haired girl a v-shaped smile of pure sarcasm. With two thumbs up she retorted, "Yeh hon, goin so great."  
"UGH look I'm not asking you to understand, I'm just asking you to respect my feelings." Marinette flung her hands out definitively, shaking them along with any notion she'd continue. "Can you do that at least?"  
Alya nodded, and groaned. "Mari, if i didn't I wouldn't have even shown you the profile. I'd have catfished someone as you already and sent you off into the world with a new hunk to drown out the slowly dying cinder of a crush you have on Adrien. And all would be well with the world!"  
Marinette narrowed her eyes in suspicion, and Alya hurriedly contined  
" BUT I DIDNT! I started you a dating profile, I filled it out- _honestly_ \- and I showed it to you just so you would know that you have options, and maybe we could find out if those options are better!" Marinette faltered. She trusted Alya, the girl who'd been rooting for her every step. If Her best friends faith in her love life was really so bleak that she'd start an online dating profile without her consent...maybe it was time for her to give up.  
"I just...I don't think I'm ready to let go of him." She said softly. Alya wrapped an arm around her smaller friend.  
"Not saying you have to. Just letting you know that you have options, and you'll never know what they are unless you test em. Maybe Adrien is your 'one' and this'll confirm it. Maybe he isn't and this'll lead you to someone who drives you wilder. All I'm sayin is...you aren't dating him, so why put your life on hold for someone you can't get to yet? "  
Marinette pouted, not wanting to give in, and really not wanting to forgive Alya for making such a good point. But she was right. She was single, and Adrien wouldn't bat a a perfect eyelash if he saw another man on Marinette's arm.  
Or would he? The thought shot through her head like lightning, ill thought out and desperate like a last breath. Maybe She could make the blonde model notice her through jealousy. It could potentially be her last shot to gauge Adrien's feelings about her. Maybe once she saw his reaction...then she could make her final decision to either persue him for good, or forget him.  
"Ok. I'll do it. " She conceded. Alya cheered and nearly trampled Marinette to get to the keyboard of the pink desktop. "I'll have to show you the page, edit it however you want! Theres pictures up already and three new messages as well...everythings anon unless you say otherwise..."  
Marinette barely heard any of the rambling. Her mind drifted elsewhere, to someone else she trusted. While she loved Alya, there was one other person she could always confide in for his candor and direct advice.  
"Heyy, Alya, d'you mind if I look over it again later? I still have that swimmable project I've got to work on for my internship interview. "  
"Mm? Oh right, I'm sorry I completely forgot about that. Sorry to take your time up, with this stupid crap," Gee, thanks Alya..."Catch you at lunch tomorrow?"  
"Course, i'm bringing the croissants with spinach and cream cheese."  
"MM! Alright, see you at the park tomorrow! Don't be late!"  
"Wouldn't dare to. Bye. "  
"Bye!"  
The brunette decended through the trap door, as Marinette fished her phone from her bag.

-  
POPPY_PUPPET: " Hey, C, you there?"  
 **#1SUPERGUY:** "Good afternoon, princess, how's this spring weather treating you?"  
POPPY_PUPPET: "Can you come over tonight?"  
# **1SUPERGUY:"** Why princess! How scandalous!"  
POPPY_PUPPET: "Chat..."  
 **#1SUPERGUY:** " LOL of course Marinette. It's been awhile, everything ok?"  
POPPY_PUPPET: " Yeah, I just need someone to talk to, and Alya"  
POPPY_PUPPET: "Well.."  
 **#1SUPERGUY** : "Say no more. I'll be there around midnight. Wont be able to stay long though, it's my turn to patrol. See you soon, princess."  
POPPY_PUPPET: "Thanks Chat."  
-

Adrien sighed. This was the third time Marinette had asked Chat Noir over. A wonder, considering that she was an utter mess speaking to him as himself, instead of his super human alter ego. A wonder still, as he often would console akuma victims after an attack while LAdybug handled the press, offering several his contact information, should they ever need help again. Except Marinette, who'd been given the information by his partner Ladybug during the attack of the Evillustrator. But out of all the akuma attack victims, surprisingly, only one ever kept in touch. His own classmate, Marinette Dupain-Cheng. Not that he minded. Adrien enjoyed the chance at spending time with his friend without her being so nervous, a trait he'd long since given up worrying about as Adrien.

He tapped away at his computer, wondering what was bothering her. Wondering what Alya couldn't help her with. Wondering if there even was anything to talk about at all...wondering if he was overthinking...  
"Oi." His green eyes ripped away from the screen.  
"What are you mopin about now?" A small fairylike creature, cat shaped and cranky, floated over to Adrien's desk. He landed on his shoulder and kicked his tiny feet up.  
"Nothing, Plagg." Adrien said, halfhartedly.  
"What, you sure? Who messaged you?" The kwami asked.  
"Marinette again."  
"Ohhh she's cute. Haha, another midnight rendevous? Hahaha!"  
Adrien rolled his eyes and swatted his Miraculous guardian away. "Well yeah but it's not like we're a couple or anything. She's a friend. I like hanging out with her. She's cool."  
"Eh, I say you give her a shot."  
"What and give up on my Lady? Not a chance."  
Plagg faked a retch. " You're nothing but a walking cliche, you know that right?"  
"True, but I'd rather be a happy cliche than boring and loveless."  
"Was that supposed to be deep? Or are you just losing your joke edge? Cuz that wasn't even clever."  
"Dude."  
"I'm just saying!"  
"And all i'm saying is that maybe we run out of Camembert tonight. "  
"Whoa defensive. What's got you in a mood?"  
The kwami flitted away, chuckling to himself.  
"Don't go too far, Plagg, we have patrol duty tonight."  
"Yeah, yeah."  
Adrien grumbled to himself, somehow feeling slightly stung over the interaction. He glanced over at Plagg, thinking.  
"Hm." He turned back to his desktop.  
-

ELNINO: MY MAN Hey adrien what's up?  
 **CARDIAC_AGRESTE** : hey can we talk real quick? I need to ask you something i  
 **CARDIAC_AGRESTE:** i was reading something  
 **CARDIAC_AGRESTE** : Ah never mind its stupid.  
ELNINO: Bro its not stupid, you know im here for you  
 **CARDIAC_AGRESTE** : Well, just, don't crack any jokes.  
ELNINO: Scouts honor dude  
 **CARDIAC_AGRESTE** : Well, see theres this girl  
ELNINO: broooooo TT_TT a girlllllll  
 **CARDIAC_AGRESTE:** bro no  
ELNINO: is she a PRETTY GIRL!?  
 **CARDIAC_AGRESTE:** BRO NO  
 **CARDIAC_AGRESTE** : I MEAN YEH BUT  
 **CARDIAC_AGRESTE:** DUDE I MEAN IM NOT  
ELNINO: :D  
 **CARDIAC_AGRESTE** : god forget it  
ELNINO: Wait! i'll be good!  
ELNINO: ADRIEEEEEN  
ELNINO: BROOOO  
ELNINO: TELL ME YOUR GIRL TROUBLES BRO  
ELNINO: Bro?  
ELNINO: BROOOO  
-

Adrien laughed a little. He knew he started something unneccesary. He didn't even know what he wanted to ask about Marinette, much less if there was even a problem. He just knew he felt uneasy about going to visit with a civilian- a girl at that- without Ladybug's knowledge. Almost like he was cheating on her.  
"Well, I guess I can fix that right now."  
"Stop talking to yourself Adrien. We don't need _another_ psycho Chat Noir."  
"Plagg shu...wait another?"  
"Dude, you think the power of destruction just doesnt go to anyones head...?"  
"I,well..."  
"Course you're not thinking. Over there about to chat up Ladybug like a neeeeeeeerd even though she's not into you."  
"You're friggin feisty today Plagg."  
"And you're friggin infatuated. Go on a date, forget about the bug girl."  
"Dude."  
"Right back at you."  
Adrien coughed and returned to his computer, logging back into his Chat Noir account.

-  
 **#1SUPERGUY:** Good evening, my lady!  
Luckycharm12615: Hey Chat. And no you aren't getting out of patrol tonight. I covered for you twice this week.  
 **#1SUPERGUY:** Hey cant a guy cat-ch up with his sweet-paw-rt  
Luckycharm12615: I will smack you through the screen. Don't test me. I'll find a way.  
 **#1SUPERGUY:** Haha you're cute.  
Luckycharm12615: Damn straight.  
 **#1SUPERGUY:** Hey but look, straight talk with me?  
Luckycharm12615: My god the kitty wants a conversation it's a miracle.  
 **#1SUPERGUY** : LB  
Luckycharm12615: sorry sorry. What is is, you ok?  
 **#1SUPERGUY:** I do need to take off during patrol for say, an hour or so. Is that cool by you?  
Luckycharm12615: Chaton we're partners. If you need the time go for it. You don't need my permission.  
 **#1SUPERGUY:** Thanks, but i just wanted to run it by you. No chance you can cover?  
Luckycharm12615: Sorry, Chat, but I'm meeting someone tonight.  
 **#1SUPERGUY:** What? Who?  
Luckycharm12615: Hahaha wouldn't you like to know?  
 **#1SUPERGUY** : I honestly would, I don't trust men around my lady, especially when I'm not around to protect her. Should I check in on you my love?  
Luckycharm12615: Nono, i'm meeting him as myself, not as ladybug. Secret identity and all that jazz.  
 **#1SUPERGUY:** So it is a man!?  
Luckycharm12615: I wouldn't call him that hahaha but he's my best friend don't worry, if you knew him you'd *love* him  
 **#1SUPERGUY:** I doubt it.  
 **#1SUPERGUY** : Just be careful.  
Luckycharm12615: Aren't I always, silly cat?  
 **#1SUPERGUY:** I guess.  
 **#1SUPERGUY** : oh and my lady?  
Luckycharm12615: Hmm?  
 **#1SUPERGUY:** Thanks for the PURRmission!  
Luckycharm12615: Yep. Killing you on sight. You only have yourself to blame.


	2. Chapter 2

_Tap. Taptap._

Marinette snapped awake. She'd dozed off waiting for Chat Noir to show.

 _taptaptaptaptaptaptaptaptaptaptaptaptaptaptaptap_

She glared into the window as the tapping became more impatient. The tapping continued until she made her way over to the round window, throwing it open, startling the boy hanging right outside. She continued to glare at the blonde Chat Noir, the black sneakers of his catsuit against the wall and one hand on the window.

"Are you trying to wake the neighborhood?" She hissed. Chat Noir looked at her, almost sheepishly, smiling broadly as he climbed inside.

"It started to be fun?" He chuckled, tapping definitively once more against the glass of the window before closing it. He reached behind his back to unclip a box on his belt. "I brought some truffles." He said, offering the box.

Marinette blinked. "Well, I mean thanks but..." she was trying to think of a polite way of saying that she lived over a bakery. Chat Noir was acting very strange, much too calm and gentlemanly.

"They're from sweden."

"...gimme..." She took the box silenty and set them on the desk, untying the red ribbon.

" Hey," Chat prodded, "So, how come you needed to see me tonight? Theres nothing actually wrong is there?"

He was worried, she noticed.

"No no no," She began, waving her hands in embarrassment. She took a seat on the edge of her bed, " I just needed some advice on something and...well I figured you were the one to talk to."

"Advice on what?"

"Eh...boys..?"

Chat Noir's eyes widened. He practically pounced over to Marinette wrapping his body around her where she sat. He put his arms across her like a lapbar, and purred.

"What do 'boys' have that i don't? You should just date me, princess!" He laughed.

Marinette rolled her eyes. So he flirted with all the girls, Ladybug wasn't special. She laughed back at him.

"After you brought me fancy chocolate? Just propose already. " She clasped her hands together and batted her lashes sarcastically.

"We'll get married on the moon, princess!"

"Dreamy!"

Chat Noir pulled Marinette into a hug and rolled her on top of him, holding her aloft.

" We can invite your classmates!"

"Even Chloe? "

"And miss a chance to make her seethe with jealousy? I bet daddy couldn't give her a wedding on the moon."

"Oh chat just take me now!"

"Anytime milady!"

He paused, and set Marinette down on the bed, and laughed.

"Sorry, I didn't mean to call you that." She continued to giggle.

"Why? You call me that all the time." Chat looked at her oddly.

"I've never called you that, Princess. Only Ladybug."

Marinette stuttered and cleared her throat, "Oh, oh i must have misheard, then. Sorry." Chat shrugged.

"No, I'm sorry," He said. "You didn't take any of that seriously did you?"

"No not really. We're friends." He sighed, relieved.

"Ok, cuz if we're gonna talk about romance, you have to know...I'm in love with Ladybug." Chat placed a hand over his heart, sighing dreamily.

Marinette snorted. "I think you've mentioned."

"Hard not to. She's pretty amazing."

He smiled as a pillow hit against the side of his head.

"Two-timing me I see!"

"I would never, my princess!" He gasped with fake hurt.

It grew quiet over them, and the black-clad superhero sighed once more, sullenly, and laid back on the pink duvet. Marinette patted his head, and stroked his black cat ears.

"That feels weird.."He said, eyes closed, making no effort to move. "Well...I came to talk, let's talk."

"Well...I guess I should start off by giving you some context." Marinette removed her hands from Chat Noir's head and rolled onto her side." There's this guy i've been-hey."

"I didn't say stop." The boy had taken her unoccupied hand and placed it back onto his head. "Continue," He bade. Marinette chuckled and gave him a noogie as he quietly protested.

"Like I said, theres a guy I've liked for a while. Uck, head over heels, can barely get a word out near him. He's great and I love hanging out with him but he thinks I'm a total spaz." She pointed a finger gun to her head, making a slow gunshot noise with her mouth. Chat opened one green eye at her, eyeballing her until she put the hand back onto his head.

"So...you need advice on how to ask him out or..."

"Sort of? I need help wondering if I should...get over him?"

"Oh? Over him and under me, good solution there. I support it. " Chat Noir crossed his claws over his stomach and nodded solemnly, fighting a smile at his own dirty wit. Marinette knocked a knuckle over his head before continuing.

"Well, it's been ages, and I guess...I feel like I have no chance with him. He's smart, gorgeous, I mean he's even a model."

At this, Chat Noir sat up.

"A model? And he's your age, right? Maybe I know him."

"Chat Noir, are you telling me that you're a model?"

"With a body and hair like this? You tell me."

Marinette faked a critical eye as she looked him over.

"Yeah, so you're telling me you aren't a model."

"I'm hurt, princess! Offended!" He lightly jabbed her arm. "So who is he?"

"Adrien Agreste? You know he's Gabriel Agreste's son, he- what?"

Chat Noir stared at her.

Marinette liked him? Is that the reason she couldn't compose herself around him? After all this time, a wave of relief washed over him, and all the fears he'd had of Marinette being intimidated, afraid, or even flat out hating him evaporated.

"So...you do know him..?" she supplied.

"Oh. Oh!" Chat coughed. "Yes. I do, actually. You can be impressed now."

"I actually am."

"Of course you are."

"Do you know him well enough to give me any advice on him?"

Chat Noir knew too well. But he was somewhat relieved that it wouldn't be Adrien breaking her heart, it would be a confidante. There was no way he could accept Marinette's feelings when he was in love with Ladybug. And for once, luck was on his side this night.

"I actually can tell you...exactly what you need to know." He said hesitantly.

Marinette smiled, "Really?"

Chat nodded, worry on his face. Marinette quickly read it, even through his mask.

"I don't have a chance do I?"

He shook his head.

"Another girl?"

"Yeah.."

"...and she returns his feelings?"

That question took him off guard. "I..well.."

Marinette shook her head. "Well, see, the reason I ask is that...I've made an ultimatum for myself. Its silly. "

"What's that?"

"Alya made me a profile on this dumb dating site...she said that I'm still single, and I should go and explore my options. See if Adrien really is my soul mate at best, find my real soulmate at worst. You know? She said I shouldn't put my life on hold for him if I can't have him. So I decided...if I can figure out one last way to make Adrien notice me, I'll keep persuing him but...if I know for sure that I can't have him...I'll find my own path to happiness and start dating."

He didn't know what to say. He saw so much of his own sorrows reflected in her words. He wanted so badly to lie, to say 'Adrien's feelings are returned' but...he knew that he was far from being accepted by Ladybug. Maybe what Marinette was saying could help him too. Maybe he should think about letting her go. Maybe he didn't need to figure out Lady's real identity when he had a _whole princess_ who was pining after him.

But he also knew he couldn't let her go easily. He chose his words carefully.

"I'm not saying you don't have a chance...don't get excited!" He warned her as her eyes lit up. "I'm just saying...this girl he likes...he's mad for her. But...realistically it might not pan out. Kind of like how you're uncertain? Thats how uncertain he is. I say...go ahead and date, you're right, don't put your life on hold for one stinky boy, but...maybe don't give up on true love either?"

Chat cursed at himself, somehow talking himself back into his dedication for Ladybug. But it seemed to help Marinette.

"Just...if it feels right in your heart...it's got to be right."

She smiled softly at him.

"Thanks Chat. I knew I could count on you. You really are one of my best friends." She leaned to kiss him on the cheek...

 _Beep._

The two looked at one another. Before she made contact, Chat Noir's ring had sounded. Marinette checked her watch, choking in shock.

"Chat, _it is 3 in the morning_! Your patrol!"

"So I'll stay out later. No big deal."

"Won't you be tired at work?"

"Work? Hahaha oh the modeling thing. Thats only part time. How old do you think I am Mari.."

 _Beep beep_

"Damn. Well. It's been absolutely a pleasure my princess." In one fluid motion, the teen superhero jumped up and gathered Marinette's hand to his face, kissing it deeply, with newfound smitteness.

"Call me anytime, dearest."

"Well if we're going to plan a wedding on the moon, I'll need you back ASAP!"

Chat laughed. "Of course."

And with that, he left again through the window.

Marinette fell back onto her bed. She pulled her phone from her pocket.  
\- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

 _POPPY_PUPPET:_ Hey Alya, its me. Sorry it's so late. I think we should go ahead with that profile.


	3. Chapter 3

"Girl, no."

Alya snatched the tablet away from Marinette who reached after it, trying to type one last thing.

"Hey wai-!" She squealed as her friend slapped the tablet onto their school desk, and retyped what she had changed. "Isn't this supposed to be honest?"

Alya glared at her. "Yes! Which is why you can't put something vague like, 'i enjoy art', you have to be more specific than that. _'Bread is nice_.' BREAD IS NICE? I swear Marinette you sound like a stoner who needs a snack. Bitch, bread is nice."

A muted snort was heard before them.

Marinette and Alya had come to class early, hoping to collaborate on her profile before school actually began, failing to notice Adrien slipping in and taking his seat.

Alya gave her side eyes and smirked before leaning across the shared table to Adrien.

"If a girl puts 'bread is nice' as an interest you'd think she's nuts, right?" She shouted.

Adrien cracked up as Marinette sunk into her seat. He didn't have to laugh so much.

"I didn't want to put too much information!" She cried, burying her face into her hands. "What would happen if they knew me? Some creep could play a joke."

Adrien wiped tears from his eyes. "Its a dating profile, right?" He asked.

Marinette blushed deeply.

"Uh, yeah, gotta, uh...gotta get in the game! G-gotta chase some uh...some tail?"

Adrien's inner Chat Noir did circles in his head. He could barely quiet his light laughter. He took a deep breathe and

"Well its meow or never."

He froze as his sentence trailed off. What did he say?!

Marinette stared at him, a wobbly smile on her face, as she groaned quietly. Alya screeched in delight at the joke.

"Hahahahaha, what are you Chat Noir now!?" She howled.

Adrien chuckled nervously at himself, regret coursing through him.

"No, no, I guess...I'm a fan of his."

"Oh!" Marinette made a loud, high pitched noise of realization.

"Jeez, excited much, girl?" Alya winced.

"Hhehe, uh Adrien!" the black haired girl proclaimed. "I found out something about Chat Noir, you might be interested in?" At this her bespectacled friend inched closer to her.

"Sweetie are you telling me you found out somethin about the superheroes I'm tailing...and didn't tell me..?" She squinted her eyes in exaggerated anger.

Marinette waved her hands in front of her.

"N-no no! I j-just thought he uh...that Adrien would've, cuz he's...um..he knows Chat Noir?" Alya gasped and stared at the blonde boy.

"You've met Chat Noir?!"

"I..." he began, to be cut off by Marinette, "No Alya, I mean he's met Chat as his secret identity." Alya gaped at her and back at Adrien.

"YOU KNOW HIS _IDENTITY_?!"

Adrien screamed with laughter inside his head. "No of course not hahaha!"

Marinette "No, Alya, Chat Noir told me he works with Adrien as a model. So they might have met at work before."

"Wait, who told you?" Alya held her hands up in a 'stop' motion.

"Oh uh...maybe i...um.."

"Oh no, no getting out of this one...how do you know Chat Noir?"

"Well you see..."

A sudden ear-piercing scream echoed through the empty classroom, originating from outside the open door. Seconds later a worried classmate Ivan ducked his head into the door.

The dual color haired boy saw them and cried gruffly, "There's an akuma attack in the building! Everyone's leaving, you guys need to go!"

The trio nodded curtly and stormed out, only to be stopped in the hall by a ceiling tile crashing down before them. Ivan screamed in panic. Marinette looked to Alya and shouted, "Get Ivan outside! I'll see if anyone else is inside!"

"Marinette, wait!" But before they could say a word, she'd run off into the depths of the school. Alya held onto a panic-stricken Ivan with both arms to support the large boy and looked at Adrien worriedly. He shrugged.

"I'll go after her, you two get out."

"But.." a second panel crashed down as the school trembled. That was all that was needed to convince them to get moving.

He watched them run to safety. "Plagg," he opened his shirt to release the kwami into action.

"I'm here, Adrien! Let's go find Marinette!"

"Plagg, claws out!"

...

Chat Noir dove through the rumbling halls of the high school, skidding in and out of each abandoned class.

"Come ON Marinette!" He hissed," You've CAT to stop disappearing on me!"

"Poor kitty, don't have a hissy fit!"

Chat Noir spun around to shoot an expressionless look of unamusement to the girl hanging upside down behind him. Her pigtails flopped about as she cartwheeled herself upright and retracted the wired yo-yo she used as a weapon. Chat sucked his teeth at her. "Your jokes are super weak milady."

She smirked at him. "Its not nice to be a hypo-cat."

Chat Noir ignored her and peered down the empty hallway. Ladybug put a hand over his shoulder and squeezed.

"If you're still looking for Marinette, she's made it out already."

"How'd you know I was-"

"Hey, we have an akuma to deal with; I know where it's at. You ready for this?" Chat sighed with releif that Ladybug had already completed the recon.

"Lead the way milady."

The duo chased each other down into the courtyard of the school, riding railings and grappling through the lower levels. The redclad superhero swung and landed to an abrupt halt before a glass-enclosed wing, ducking just underneath the long panel of glass surrounding the room. She silently motioned for her partner to do the same.

"From what I can tell," She began, peeking into the window to ensure a clear coast, "the akuma is in the flower she's holding. I'm not completely sure of what her powers are, just that she's been doing something with the computers in the library. But with the building shaking the way it is.." She motioned at the next wave of tremors, "It's anything but friendly."

Chat Noir nodded, scanning for any movement.

"So how are you proposing we get the drop on her?" He asked out of the side of his mouth. Ladybug pointed to the enormous skylight stretched across the ceiling.

"They boarded it up for the storm that came through. And she can't focus on the computers if she cant see the screens. I saw her throw a lamp because it was too bright." She indicated the smashed drywall on the other side of the library.

"So you need me to unboard the skylight?"

"Yeah. But like I said, be careful,I still don't know what she's planning."

"Well lets _shine a little light on the situation_ , shall we?"

Ladybug jabbed his arm. "Go." She said, and he raced away.


	4. Chapter 4

Even as the tremors quieted and the halls lay still, Ladybug kept a watchful eye over the darkened library, waiting for her moment to burst through the doors of the communal area. Rows of tables lined the place, each equipped with several computer monitors flickering rapidly from one photo to the next. She watched as closely as she could to the photos, blurred from speed, in case she could catch even the slightest of similarities to what she assumed would be victims.

A loud wooden crunch ripped through the main room of the library, and Ladybug cursed the ostentatious nature of her partner as she finally saw an abrupt shift in the shadows. A plump figure became illuminated by the glint of the flashing screens of the computers, revealing a round girl in the plainest akumatized costume Marinette had seen yet. She wore a black floor length, split sided dress, her face covered in a dark veil and a rose clutched in her hand to her large chest. Her hair was a mountain of yellow ringlets that bounced as she tilted her hidden, expressionless face to the side.

"I see we have a bit of a pest problem. Tut tut, and in a school so nice, no less." she crooned.

Ladybug ducked beneath what she hoped would be the akumas line of vision and inched to the open door.

"Hurry Chat!" She thought urgently to herfelf, the slightest rays of sun catching her eyes in the darkened hallway. With another loud crack of wood, and a strained grunt following, the library was bathed in sun. Ladybug almost expected the heavy girl in black to scream out as the light washed over her. But instead, she put a hand on her hip and tilted her head to the other side.

"It seems Serendipity will have to fight for Hawkmoth's pretty Miraculous." She said, almost yawning, as though the thought bored her.

"But then, I guess pretty is only skin deep. And as you can see," She chuckled darkly and gestured to herself,"I have a lot of skin to penetrate."

More light swam in as Chat Noir removed the last of the boards over the skylight. He swung open the panel and inserted his head.

"What's your game, Serendipity?!" He shouted.

The akumatized girl placed a hand over her heart in fake shock conveyed with her body language.

"Moi?" She snarled. "Oh you mistake me, pretty kitty, this is no game. This is mercy!"

She lifted the rose, and as she pointed it toward Chat Noir, it became golden and shining.

"Chat no!" Ladybug dove inside, swinging the end of her yo-yo at Serendipity, entwining her wrist and misdirecting her aim. The golden beam barely missed Chat Noir, and he took the opportunity to vault into the room, rolling into a summersault upon landing. He unsheathed his baton and held it at the ready.

"You'll have to try better than that!" He teased.

She sucked her teeth in annoyance.

"Darling, do you honestly think you can subdue me with one hand? Hup." the akumatized girl flipped the gilded rose from her tied hand to the other and aimed again, the golden blast coursing through the air with an electric whir, striking the blonde hero directly in his face. Chat Noir screamed in shock, dropping his baton to sheild his eyes.

"I don't wish to hurt you!" She cried happily, "I wish only to free you from those that will break your heart, like mine was broken!" Her fist tightened around the flower wand as the beam increased. Ladybug yanked on the wire of the yo-yo, pulling the full figured girl to the floor, breaking the ray and causing her to drop the wand.

"Chat Noir, are you ok!?" Ladybug yelled.

"Oddly, I am.." He said, patting his body all over. He looked over to Ladybug with a grin, a grin that slowly faded from his face as his eyes widened and shot over the room.

"M..my lady?" He whimpered.

"Chat I'm right here.." Ladybug said, quizzically.

"I can't see you!"

"Wha-" At that moment Ladybug felt a tight yank as Serendipity pulled herself free of the yo-yo. She dove to retrieve the rose, and stood, rubbing the strained wrist.

"If my blind date didn't pan out...Then all love should be blind!" She cackled.

Ladybug stared at her partner, who was clutching his hands, shooting worried looks around the room.

"Better give me those Miraculous, dearie. The longer he stays blind to his love, the worse it gets. Soon he won't be able to hear you, he'll even forget you ever existed!"

"What!? No!" Chat shouted, he bounded towards her as she twisted the petals of the rose wand. He was cut off by a swift kick to the chin, and as he soared around her, she kicked him again into a nearby wall. She twisted the petals of the wand again as Ladybug took her chance to overtake her. The little wand clicked loudly and suddenly extended outward into a long staff.

"As we speak, my computers are infecting every photo they can find, erasing the people's sweethearts from their vision, from their memory!"

She swung the staff into Ladybug's gut. The super hero grunted in pain.

"Ladybug, are you alright?!" Chat froze, worried.

He can't fight if he cant see me...She worried to herself.

Serendipity whirled her staff and aimed at the rows of tables.

"Rise, my dearest! Rise!" She cried out as the computers began to hover, and crash into one another, sticking more and more together until a beast of monitors rose up in the center of the library, its head large and square and its arms bulky. In its center, a thick braid of cords protruded like an umbilical cord, leading away to the back of the library.

"Bring me the Miraculous!" Serendipity screamed.

Ladybug didn't hesitate as the situation escalated without warning. She took a wide stance and yelled to the sky,

"Lucky Charm!"

Into her arms dropped a fat sack of flour.

Looking at the frustrated Chat Noir who was waving his arms in search of her, she knew almost immediately. She connected the spots between the bag of flour, the shoulder of the beast, its wire lifeline, and the closet it led to. Ladybug lifted the flour and called to her partner before dumping the white powder all over herself.

"Oh how unoriginal." Serendipity retorted. "How cliche."

Chat Noir smiled as Ladybug came back into view.

"About as cliche as 'if i can't have him, nobody can?'" he retorted. The akumatized girl's shoulder's stiffened.

"You weren't there!" She screamed. "He took one look at me and ran!"

"Chat Noir!" Ladybug shouted, and she bounded her way to the mechanical beast's shoulders.

"I can see you!" He cried happily.

"Then help me out here! The cord!"

The beast waved its large arms behind itself, occupied with removing Ladybug from his back, and leaving his midsection vulnerable to attack.

"You idiot! He's coming for you!" Serendipity screeched as Chat Noir leapt to the fat braid of cords.

"Cataclysm!" He howled, dark energy surrounding his claw as he trust it upon the cords. They smoldered and fell away. The beast, without his power supply, faded and slumped over.

"My computers!" The girl cried out.

Ladybug swung her yoyo at Serendipity's staff, and snatched it away. She took it in her hands, and jumped from the huge beast. She snapped it over her knee, freeing the blackened akuma.

"No more evildoing for you! Time to de-evilize!" And with that cry of victory, she opened her yo yo to steal the akuma from the air, purifying it. She recalled it, and touched a finger across the base, releasing a pure white moth.

"Bye bye little butterfly. Miraculous Ladybug!"

She threw what was left of the flour sack to the air, as the power of creation swept its red gleam over them, restoring the library, and Chat Noir's sight.

Serendipity knelt on the floor as her disguise melted away. Her veil disintegrated to reveal a pudgy, overmade face, covered in huge glasses. She wore a darling pink dress, and her blonde curls hadn't changed a spot.

"Hey..." Chat Noir knelt beside her. "Are you ok?"

"Yeah.."She wheezed, exhausted. "I don't know why I was so mad..."

"Don't worry. " Ladybug shrugged. "Happens to the best of us."

"Yeah...and if its any consolation, that guy's a jerk." Chat laughed. "You're beautiful, ah..."

"River." The girl smiled. "River Lee."

"Well, River, next time, maybe take your anger out on something a little more productive. I hear the fencing club is looking for new members." Ladybug winked.

The girl smiled at the duo as each of their miraculous sounded off.

"Time to go." Chat said, nodding to Ladybug, who then swung out through the skylight. He paused and turned back to the girl. He handed her a small slip.

"Look, if you ever need a friend, this is my contact information. We can't have you akumatized again, ok? That was uh...that scared me, haha."

River gazed at him. "I'm so sorry..." tears came to her eyes.

"Oh no no, it's ok. I just like to make sure the people of Paris are safe. Including Hawkmoth's victims...especially Hawkmoth's victims."

"Will I see you again?" She asked.

He saluted.

"I honestly hope not. Au revoir!" he winked as he extended his staff and exited through the skylight.

\- - - - - - - - - - -

AN/ * sorry for the late release, I'm in the middle of moving, haha  
But just to mess with you...how bout that Miss Piggy Akuma?  
Go ahead. Go look up her real name. Thanks for reading! As of today, the updates probably wont be daily, but they will be longer! Please stay tuned! And also be sure to check out the accompanying comic, page one is out already at Skyeribbonpwny on tumblr!


	5. Chapter 5

an/ sorry about the short chapter, this move has killed me. I also havent figured out how to get the spacing to work cohesively yet, so forgive me if it's a little hard to read. hope you'll stick around! Updates will be more frequent now!

Adrien tapped angrily at his desk with his pen. His homework lay unfinished before him, unusual for the intelligent young man. He stared distractedly into the distance, his mind zipping around thoughts of Marinette. Angry thoughts of Marinette. Hurt thoughts. Thoughts he knew he had to bottle up or risk revealing his identity.

With the akuma attack, he hadn't had a chance to actually adress the issue of his friend revealing part of his civilian life to whom she thought was another civilian, but upon returning home the thoughts began to stew and tear him away from the task at hand.

He leaned back into his office chair and groaned deeply as he drug a hand down his face in distress. He could protest as his alter ego, but then Marinette would suspect Adrien as Chat Noir, as she'd only revealed his occupation to Alya and Adrien. He could complain as himself, but then she might be suspicious that he had such a late reaction to the information, or even why he'd be upset she'd told him. And again suspicion would be placed on him.

There was no way he could address something that his friend had done to hurt him. Ladybug would never approve of this girl, he thought wistfully. Ladybug would probably be pissed he'd even told her anything.

But conversely...Adrien was pretty pissed as well. The more he glared at his unanswered homework, the more he stewed...he thought back to Marinette mentioning the vaugeness of her dating profile. How hypocritical. She didn't want anyone to know too much but here she was blabbing his secrets to the world!

With an exaggerated harumph, Adrien shoved the workbook away from himself and pulled his keyboard closer.

"Hmm..?" A dreary eyed kwami floated lazily above the large desk as Adrien ticked away at the computer.

"What are you doing over here, noisy?" Plagg asked.

"Nothin'." Adrien grumbled, annoyed. His keyboard rattled. Hopefully she'd taken Alya's advice...Ah!

"Found it!" He cried, triumphant. He tapped once more in victory at the computer.

"Found what?" Plagg peered at the monitor.

"Whoa Adrien, what are you doing?"

"Being petty."

"That's not cool, man."

The kwami floated away with a disappointed aura surrounding him.

Adrien paused, wondering if he'd overreacted. He had intended to play a joke on Marinette. He'd made his own dating profile and messaged her through the site. His thought process had gone haywire, and he realized what he'd done, and the consequences he'd have to face if she ever saw the messages.

"Crap..." He said.  
\- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

 **Ofthenight;** Marinette, I'm in love with you. I always have been. I watch your balcony every night just to see you.

I know you've been seeing chat Noir.  
\- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Adrien's messages trailed off as he panicked. He hadn't completely thought through his plan of action, and about ten different Ideas culminated into the trainwreck. He typed quickly, trying to correct his mistake.  
\- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

 **Ofthenight:** I'm very similar to chat noir  
\- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

He screamed into his hands  
\- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

 **ofthenight:** No, im better than chat noir  
\- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

He hadn't meant for his prank to come off so creepily. He typed more, desperately trying to fix his mistake

 **ofthenight:** I know you love Adrien Agreste

\- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -  
Adrien threw his hands up into the air, defeatedly. He barely had enough social experience to act pleasant around people and interact normally, much less try to play a joke on his friends. This was a disaster. Marinette could not see this under any circumstances. He had to get into her account. He had to delete these before she saw. How could he...  
\- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

 **#1SUPERGUY:** HEY! Who's my favorite princess!

 **Poppy_Puppet:** Haha meeee

 **#1SUPERGUY** : Damn skippy, and who's the best darn superhero in the world?

 **Poppy_puppet:** Ladybug, no contest

 **#1SUPERGUY:** Wow oh wow am I hurt. Man, I guess you can just go eat all this imported junk food and watch this Jagged Stone documentary with LADYBUG THEN

 **Poppy_puppet:** Ah! Are you trying to fatten me up, chaton?

 **#1SUPERGUY:** Wont be too hard

 **Poppy_Puppet:** Ass, my room, now.

 **#1SUPERGUY:** I was kidding! I was kidding!

 **#1SUPERGUY:** MARI DONT KILL ME

 **#1SUPERGUY:** MARI YOU WEIGH LIKE THREE POUNDS IF ANYTHINGYOU SHOULD EAT MORE

 **#1SUPERGUY** : THIS IS WHY I CAN'T BE MEAN JOKINGLY

 **Poppy_Puppet** : Omg chat just come over

 **#1SUPERGUY** : mon dieu

 **Poppy_puppet:** oh i'll mon your dieu just get over here, mr. comedy


	6. Chapter 6

Chat Noir balanced his package of candy as he bounded over the Parisian rooftops.

"I got this, I got this." He sweated under his supernatural cat suit. The leathery material stuck to his neck as he swallowed nervously. He caught the ledge of Marinette's balcony and hoisted himself onehandedly over the railing. To his surprise, as he rose, Marinette was there in the garden, surrounded by twinkling lanterns strung around the little makeshift pagoda. The light lent a soft glow over her, making her smile more radiant, and setting a beautiful atmosphere for the clear night. The dark haired girl hugged her skinny knees to her chest where she sat upon several plus pillows piled around her. She laughed softly and gestured to a tray of lemonade.

"Too much?" She laughed softly. Chat smiled. He hooked a leg over the rail and stepped onto the balcony.

"No, this is ...this is nice." He assured her. "But I thought we were gonna watch a movie?" So I can get into your room, he continued in his head.

Marinette shrugged.

"It was such a nice night out, I thought we could stargaze for a bit." She patted the pillows near her. "I wanna...chat."

Chat Noir laughed out loud at the quip and nodded. He took a seat beside her and gazed up before letting his full weight fall onto the mountain of pillows. Which he noted. "How many pillows does one tiny girl need?" He joked.

"You seem to be enjoying them, huh?" She jabbed.

"I'm a cat, I sure do love a comfy place to nap." The blonde superhero closed his eyes and stretched with exaggeration. "And boy is this comfy."

He opened his eyes to find Marinette's face above his.

"Hehe" She giggled. "Just like a real kitty." She leaned down and quickly landed a kiss on his nose.

Chat Noir froze and stared at her.

"I uh...I...well." She stayed incredibly close to him. He blinked at her, expressionless.

Her hands brushed over his shoulders.

"Its...it's sort of what I wanted to talk to you about."

"O-oh?"

"I think..." Marinette touched her forehead to his. "I think you were right."

"Wha...right about w-what."

"About...if it feels right in my heart..."

Marinette thought back to the battle with Serendipity.

When it hit her that it didn't matter whether Chat Noir flirted with her as Ladybug, or with her as Marinette.

Because the moment she disappeared from his sight...she knew. She knew it was her he was in love with. Chat Noir was her best friend, her partner in crime, so to speak. He had never hurt her, never let her down, never spared a negative word.

Adrien never noticed her...he hurt her, unintentionally sure but nonetheless, all she had with him were a few bittersweet moments of bliss and a neverending infatuation that just couldn't be healthy for her.

But Chat was history, he was home.

So why pursue infatuation when she could end up with someone who seemed to be made for her?

"Stop...Marinette..." Chat Noir whispered as she pressed her lips over his.

He wanted to be angry, because again here she was in all her impulsive and selfish behavior. Here she was acting without any concern for his feelings and yet...he gave in. He let himself sink into the kiss, hesitantly pushing his fingers through her hair. The bands holding one of her pigtails snapped softly by his claws and she giggled into his mouth, reaching to release the other one. Marinette's hair flowed around her, spilling over her shoulder blades and forming a little cave where her lips met his.

She kissed him again and again, their hands feeling over each other with the aggressiveness that comes with powering through shyness. She caressed his face, thumbing his mask as he held her back, stroking her down to the beginning of her hips.

She moaned softly and drew him up, kneeling down until she sat on his lap.

"Stop." With that, Chat Noir pulled her away.

"Sorry..." She pouted slightly.

"It's fine."

They sat like that for a short while, curled together. Chat looking to the stars and Marinette with her face lain on his chest.

"Chat...I think I want to be with you."

"Shhh. Let me think, princess."

"That might take too long."

"Hmm." He chuckled and started to stroke her hair. He had really begun to care for this girl.

"I think...I might like that." He said, finally. "But...I don't know if I could tell you who I really am...not just yet at least."

Marinette didn't share the sentiment. She wanted to reveal that he was in love with Ladybug, with whom she was one in the same, and make him feel like he didn't need to choose. And yet...

"You're you. That's all that matters to me. If you're more comfortable being my chaton, I think I could handle it until you've decided to tell me."

Chat Noir gazed at her.

"You think you'll be with me long enough to know my identity?" He asked, touched.

"Yeah...I do."

He squeezed her with persistence.

"I've decided." He said.

"What?"

"To fall in love with you, Marinette."

She beamed and kissed him again.

"I made the right choice, didn't I?"

"You've made me happy."

"I'm glad."


	7. Chapter 7

Chat Noir was stuck.

As much as he tried to finesse himself from under the sleeping Marinette, his arm couldn't budge. But the if the boy had no motivation before, now he had more than enough to spare, enough to motivate him to move the moon from the sky.

His ring began to sound, and he glared pointedly at the trapdoor leading to Marinette's bedroom.

He had to get to her phone, her computer, something and delete those messages.

Boyfriends didnt worry their girlfriends on purpose.

He thought. Maybe. Or did they? Adrien had no idea what to expect; they'd been a couple for a whole 45 minutes, what was he supposed to do?

Oh god he was someone's boyfriend. Chat Noir, he corrected himself, was someone's boyfriend. And his girlfriend wasnt LAdybug?!

Things were changing and changing so fast.

His head spun as he finally managed to squirm the rest of his arm from underneath his sleeping princess.

Oh...But...no she wasn't Ladybug. He still had feelings for Ladybug. Was that even fair? Should he have even agreed to this? The more he stared at her, the more he panicked. The more worried he grew that he would just screw the whole thing up. He knew she was in love with Adrien, too. It was twisted and scary to keep that information from her, what if she stopped loving Adrien all together and when she found out he was Adrien the whole time...she stopped loving Chat too?

Was he even in love with her?

Could he fall in love with her?

He wanted to, he thought. He liked her, sure. She was amazing and talented and a good friend. And he found all her impulsions endearing, even. Fun surprises.

He needed to delete the messages.

He slunk through the trapdoor, softening the sound with his paw between the door and the jamb.

"Hup!" He landed with a thud louder than he had intended and froze, watching the door fearfully for movement. Chat Noir tiptoed through the room to Marinette's desk, looking for her phone.

"Ah, there you are." A pink, crescent shaped box, opened like a clamshell lay on the desk among dozens of sketches and fabric swatches. Inside was the phone, a small notebook, and a tiny red toy. Chat reached for the phone.

*snap*

The box bit into his wrist as it slammed shut over his hand.

"What." He gawked at the trap.

He tugged and pulled and kicked at it with his feet but the box stayed clammed up on his arm. In frustrastion he shook it, rattling around it's contents.

A small squeak preluded the smallest of bites on his finger.

He gasped in mild pain and held onto his wrist with his free hand in panic.

Did something inside BITE him!?

Oh god oh god oh god.

A key, there had to be a key, he thought, inspecting the little keyhole above his trapped hand.

The box squealed again.

Chat Noir danced with dread.

"Chat?" He heard Marinettes muffled, sleepy voice calling him.

Fuuuuck.

"Honey?"

The teen superhero wanted to cry with delight at the new little pet name, but now was the time to be terrified. Not enamoured.

"Coming darliiiiing!" He sang, despite his sweating neck and cracking, fearful voice.

He popped his head up through the trap door.

"I...was just leaving the movie and candies in your room in case you wanted to have another lil date night, Princess!"

Marinette laughed. "Theyre still on the table, Chat." She pointed to the unmoved treats on the low coffee table beside her, next to the lemonade that had long since been watered down, untouched and full of water from the melted ice.

"Whoopsie! Musta forgot!" He squealed, "Well ooh boy is it late, gotta get you some rest for school tomorrow!"

"Tomorrow is Sunday, Chaton," She crooned teasingly.

"Well, oh wow YAAAAWN" He outstretched a single arm, concealing the box behind his back, wincing slightly at another bite. "Rings about to give out you know and patrol still to do so I will see you another night text me,kisses!" And with that, Chat jumped off the building and ran for his life.

As Tikki, the ladybug kwami, bounced around in the box around his hand, unbeknownst to him.

AN/ Sorry for another short chapter! The next will be longer, promise! I just like making sure I update as soon as possible. What do y'all prefer? Longer chapters and a week or two of waiting or shorter chapters and a day or two of waiting?


	8. Chapter 8

"What do I do, what do I do, WHAT DO I DO." Adrien shook his arm violently around as his chat noir suit dissolved around him.

"OWW" He yelped as his finger was bitten again, this time without the layer of protection his suit lent him. Plagg raced to the box clamped around his miraculous holder's arm, swarming around it to inspect.

"What were you thinking!" He cried.

"I don't know just help meee..." Adrien wailed.

"Hold still, hold still," the kwami grabbed at the box.

ding.

Adrien's face darted into the direction of his enormous computer monitor.

"That's Marinette!" He squealed, "She's missing the box oh god oh god"

"Calm down! You don't know for sure it's her! "

"It is it has to be of course I would screw everything up this early!"

"Oh for the love of..." Plagg phased quickly through the walls of the pink box, and the biting immediatly stopped.

"Heheheheheh..." Muffled giggling.

"Plagg..."

Plagg stuck only his head out of the box, a huge grin on his face.

"Don't freak out." He chuckled darkly.

"Ok..." The kwami ducked back inside, and a small click opened up the clamshell around Adrien's wrist. He reached down to open...revealing a diary, a cell phone...and two Kwamis staring back at him.

"Ohh!" A red, large headed, blue-eyed female spirit floated quickly up and stared Adrien in the face.

"You're Adrien! Called it."

"Man, really? I wouldn't have guessed Marinette. She seems too...twitchy." Plagg sank onto the coffee table that was near them.

"Honestly she's incredibly agile and creative. Well, I guess you know that, now."

"You hungry?"

"Oh, starving, I was hiding during the whole-"

"WAIT."

The two chit-chatting Kwami's blinked at Adrien's outburst.

"Are you saying...that you're.."

"Tikki! I'm the guardian of the Ladybug Miraculous." The little bug did a slight curtsy mid-air. "I've been Marinette's partner for a while now, as long as you. It's nice to finally meet you face to face instead of...suit to suit, heh."

"P..pleasure, Tikki..." Adrien stared at her, processing.

"Yes...it's exactly what you're thinking." She urged.

"Mannn what a boring reveal..." Plagg moaned

"We've had worse, Plagg, dear."

"Hah, Adrien, yeah get a load of this, about a hundred years ago, probably the chat noir before last, right?"

"He was American, it was in 1895." Tikki supplied. "But please don't tell him that-"

"He walked in on Ladybug using the can! Hahahahahah" Plagg rolled over, beside himself. Tikki rolled her eyes.

"Well, not that it's been a pleasure seeing you again, Plagg...Adrien, please take me back. We don't know if there will be an emergency. Also..." She raised an eyebrow at him. "You did sorta steal her phone..."

Adrien sat, suddenly. "Marinette is Ladybug..." His heart swelled. Even though he'd just left, he wanted to see her immediately.

"Lets go, let's go..." He motioned at Plagg, lazily staring off distractedly into the distance.

"Hey without a snack?"

"Can you make it back?"

"Yeah but I can't promise a round trip..."

"That's fine."

"Hey!" Tikki cried out, "Are you sure that's a good idea?"

"I know. So she has a right to know. I'm going to tell her about the messages too, cuz i'd be a hypocrite if i kept that secret and not this one. Too big, I won't start out my relationship with lies."

"Are you gonna talk to her first?"

"Pah, after she touched all up on me without talking to me first? Plus she almost gave away my identity!"

"To who?" Tikki looked startled.

"To...me...OKTHATSNOTTHEPOINT but look, I'm not thinking here I just need to tell her I love her I've always loved her! PLAGG! CLAWS WITH THE OUT NESS."

...

"She moved her bed..." Chat Noir whispered, looking into her window. A pink chaise lounge was in place of the large bed that had previously been in the middle of the room. He hadn't noticed in his rush to pocket her phone.

"They were fixing her loft last week, look up the stairs." Tikki pointed. Sure enough, the slight girl was curled up comfily in the bed in the loft.

Tikki opened the window quietly, and let him in before closing it again, just as silently.

Chat crept through her room and up the wrought iron steps. Tikki covered her eyed and groaned before floating away in embarrassment. He barely had to place a paw on the edge of her bed before she stirred, looking up sleepily at him.

"Chat..?" She said softly. She hummed, thinking, before she outstretched her thin arms to him, opening and closing her fingers to beckon him closer. He obliged.

"'Mere, baby..." She said. He slunk into her hold and lay there for a blissful moment, basking in the happiness that was fully knowing he was snuggled closely to the love of his life.

"Mari..." He whispered. "You've been naughty."

She blinked at him. "I am so not ready for pillow talk, Chat."

He rolled his eyes. "Filthy mind, milady..."

Marinette laughed. "I thought you only called Ladybug that."

He gazed hard at her. Not saying a word, letting her mind work.

"Milady." He said again after a moment, more firmly.

She sat straight up, her head knocking into his.

"Ow!" He cried, his claw jolting to the injured part.

"Chat." She whispered urgently, her voice laced with the tiniest of fear.

"I was...I was bad too. Before you say anything...let me explain. Its gonna take a minute..."

"I am absolutely all ears."

"Cute ears."

"Don't you even start with me."

"Heh..." He winced at her angry glare.

"Well...I'll tell you the first part last..."

"Why?"

"Because it's gonna reveal my identity Mari, jeez, you suck at dramatic romances."

"Because I'm mad!"

"And this whole thing started cuz I was mad at you!"

"Oh...wait, huh?" Marinette cupped his face and her eyes softened.

"Chaton whatever it was I'm so sorry, I didn't mean it, I'll make it up to you..."

Chat couldn't help but laugh uncontrollably at the ease of her apology. She didn't even know what she'd done and had immediately conceded to being wrong. If he had just...

"If I had spoken to you directly this wouldn't have happened!" He laughed in realization. He almost felt bad for thinking she was self absorbed.

"So..what happened?"

"Well...you did something that hurt me, and I sent you some...really stupid messages on the dating website you signed up for."

"Oh...I...I deleted that."

Chat Noir slapped himself in the head and groaned. All that trouble...

"Can I see them?" She grinned.

He rubbed his face in his hands and pulled out his baton-phone.

"Here," he said, shoving the messages at her.

She scanned them quickly and chuckled.

"Chat, I would've immediately known this was you."

"What! And after all the trouble I went to trying to delete them!"

"What?! What did you do?!"

Sheepishly he smiled. "Tikki..." He called.

"Tikki!?"

"Tikki." The red kwami laughed from below the loft.

"So wait what, you found her or..."

"Your box bit my hand! I went for your phone and it bit me! Who has a bitey box!?"

"Superheroes."

"I...that is an excellent point you're right."

"So you...stole...my diary box."

"That was your diary!?"

"No funny ideas,baby."

"Aw...call me baby again."

"You ARE a baby! I can't believe this!" She fell back onto her pillows. "Of all the stupid ways to reveal myself..."

"According to Plagg, there were worse." He said bemusedly.

"Stop telling that story!" Tikki hissed faintly.

"Plagg?"Marinette asked.

"My kwami."

She thought deeply for a moment. "It sort of didn't occur to me that you'd have a kwami."

"Well I do. He's a pain in the ass. Anyways. So, Ladybug."

She groaned and covered her face. "What?"

"Bet I can beat your bad reveal with a worse one."

"Shoot."

"The thing you did to make me mad...you revealed information about my secret identity...to my secret identity."

"So did not." She laughed out loud. "What are you talking about?"

"You told me I was a model and I might know me."

"Shut the fuck up." She froze. "Nope."

Marinette shoved Chat away and scrambled to the edge of her bed.

"Noooo," Chat dove and caught her by the waist. "Face me like a man!" He laughed.

"No no no no no," She she struggled against him.

"Why cuz you know what it means?"

"Noooo?"

"Well, I've been in love with Ladybug...and I told you alllll about it..."

"Not listening no"

"And you were in love with Adrien and told me alllllllll about it."

"Chaton, please.." She slowed down and sat still. She drooped and her face fell to her hands. "I don't think I can even process this." Her shoulders shook.

"Oh no, no no princess I'm sorry I didn't think I'd make you cry..." He wrapped her into a tight hug and stroked her hair. "But sweet girl do you know what it means?"

She sobbed and looked at him, her face covered in tears and snot.

"Noooo." She wailed, as he laughed softly and turned her to face him, hoisting her whole body back onto the bed.

"We've been in love with each other since day one. We didn't have to forget about anyone. We were...meant to be, how lucky are we?"

"S-sooo luckyyyy..." Marinette sobbed. "Chaton...I'm Ladybug."

"I know sweet girl, I know." He stroked her head again as she cried. "Hey guess what?"

"W-whaaat?"

"Claws off..."

Adrien Agreste and a black kwami sat on the bed before Marinette.

"Oh ew...tissue, Adrien, give her a tissue." Plagg winced.

"Meet Plagg, aforementioned pain in my ass."

Marinette stared at them in awe as Adrien struggled to locate something around her bed. Tikki had floated up and helped him.

"Here, in this drawer here. Her handkerchief..."

"Thanks Tikki..." He went to wipe her face, but she grabbed the napkin herself before he touched her.

"I'm freaking out a little." She said woodenly. Her heart pounded out of her chest. She was suddenly very aware of herself, the fact that she was braless and on her bed in pajamas with her longtime crush, and newly minted boyfriend.

"Still love me?" He joked.

"Totally just..."

"Nervous?"

"Yes and no...I mean...I'm nervous but...that anxiety I used to have around you is completely gone...Probably now because I know what a huge dork you are how in the HELL did we not realize? We're so stuuuupid Adrien..." His smile widened as she said his name.

"You're stupid.." He chuckled. "You cried, you dork."

"You didn't notice that my hair didn't change?!"

"Well now I do gee thanks!"

"Leave it to a guy to not notice his girlfriends hair..."

"Ohh scathing."

"Uggggh you beautiful idiot." She squeezed his face and kissed his nose.

"Now's the part of the dramatic romance where we kiss passionately and the camera pans up after tastefully showing one nipple."

"Well you did say I suck at this. "

" Sucking would be an excellent opener."

"Filth!" She socked him with a pillow.

"So.." He laughed.

"So...this is real, huh? This is it?"

"It is it really is and Marinette, remember when I said I was gonna fall in love with you?"

"Yeah...I.."

"Hush, me first."

"Oi..."

"Marinette, My Ladybug, I love you and I have always loved you. And I hope you'll always be my princess, and love me back too." She gathered him into a hug.

"I'll always be there for you Chat...I'm so glad I was lucky enough to fall in love with my best friend. "

"I'm sorry I cant..." Adrien mashed his face against hers. They moved together into the kiss, and what felt like a lifetime of pent up emotions escaped as they felt each other. Adrien lifted his small lady into his lap and rubbed his hands up her back, feeling her as he pushed her more deeply into his kiss, his tongue exploring her mouth. She moaned, and pulled away, embarrassed.

"I'm sorry..."

"No no, look, I'll do it too." He reached his face to her ear and moaned deeply to it. The hairs on her neck stood up and her face reddened.

"Alright, no fair being that hot."

"I win..." He laughed.

"Bet I can beat it." She crooned. He stared nervously at her.

"Wha..." Without missing a beat she lifted her shirt off. "Whoa!"

With Marinette kneeling over his lap, her breasts were now in very close proximity to his face.

"You win..." He said in a high pitch, distracted voice. And suddenly it was a very different game as she pulled his hands to them. After thouroughly massaging them for a few moments she whispered to him.

"This would probably be easier if we were both naked."

He nodded a little too enthusiastically as he removed his own shirt, revealing rippling muscles.

"Oh good god, I'm about to fuck Adonis." Marinette breathed.

"What...wait really?" He squealed.

She nodded. "That ok? We can stop if you..."

Suddenly he was flipping her over onto her back and burying his face in her neck, sucking and biting as she moaned in response. He yanked away her shorts and underwear,and pulled up, admiring her milky skin illuminated by nothing but the Parisian starlight pouring in from the windows.

"You're beautful." He said, breathlessly as he ran his hands down her thighs, noticing for the first time just how slight and thin they were. He could almost wrap his entire hand around one. She bit her lip and breathed heavily as his hands wents closer to her core. He bent down and began to kiss her stomach as he reached down to reveal himself, grasping his hard dick in his hands, pumping up and down as he prepared to enter her. As he touched the tip to her opening, she sat up suddenly.

"Wait, wait wait wait." She said.

"Should I stop?"

"Yes, yes yes yes."

"Weaponed sheathed, say no more."

"We don't have a condom."

"Nope, you're right. Good call."

"I'm nervous."

"Perfectly valid reason. We're both virgins, no need to rush."

"Wow...Um...you ok?"

"Marinette I respect you and love you but I am about to explode at the sight of you."

"Oh..."She grinned. "What if I..." She placed a finger into the waistband on his underwear.

"Don't start something you can't finish..." He warned.

Wordlessly she removed his member from his underwear and began to clumsily stroke it. With a loud groan he looked straight into her eyes.

"I'm so sorry." He said. And with that he pushed her down and forced his mouth onto her vagina, suckling at her little clitoris. She bit her arm in ecstasy.

"Yes, do that do that," She quietly howled. He again began to pump his dick himself, and soon she was shivering, he was shaking, and her duvet had acquired two fresh new stains.

He crawled exhaustively to her side and flopped down exaggeratedly.

"Good?"

"Sooo good."

"Love me?"

"Love you."

"Love you too..."

 _ **AN/**_  
 _ **So...this ended up being the exact details of my first sexual encounter LE GASP**_  
 _ **Fun fact, instead of cuddling, I threw up and was so tempted to make Mari throw up, but...c'et la vie. Thought this was cuter.**_


End file.
